Getting more readers for my newsletter in today's media environment is no easy task, especially when writing meaningful, relevant content is not an option. It's not that I don't want to write like that, it's just that my mind veers toward adolescent male. And no matter how hard you try, you're not gonna drag relevant or meaningful out of me.
Now if you’re looking for multiple episodes focused on butt crack stink, I'm your guy. Unfortunately, that's a pretty small niche market, so if that's not your thing I'm going to have to go with deception to get you to read my stuff, and that's on you. You're the one who insisted on growing up.
So I do what any writer who has mostly lost his moral compass does. I use clickbait. I'm going to target the elderly spinster demographic with kitten pictures, then pivot to the teenage gamer market with pictures of that same kitten being held by a nearly naked woman carrying a battle axe and spear, dressed in leather bikini armor and a winged helmet. (I swear that's a thing).
Now holding on to those readers is a problem best left to another episode. Fortunately, I have a few morals left to lose.